Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Rough Draft of Week 7 Weekly

Did the Roman Empire 'decline and fall' or did it evolve into something new?

Rome as a whole, dealt with a lot during its long reign of power. They took over many land areas, tried some different forms of government, had a very successful military, and had a lot of emperors that did both good and bad for the empire. Many emperors changed the ways of Roman living, but as a new government called the tetrarchy formed, the Roman Empire split and it was all downhill from there. The Roman Empire dealing with a lot of ups and downs during its long era of power was able to make it around a bad time and make something good out of it; but the Roman Empire did eventually fall apart completely so the empire was completely over and left in ruins because of bad emperors, religious problems, and because of the barbarians that took over the empire.  Rome, even through the worst times of its reign near the end, was able to evolve from all situations and change itself to become a different empire.

Rome began its hardship and eventual fall of their empire when Diocletian started the new government called tetrarchy. “The stability of this system suffered greatly after Diocletian and Maximian retired from office. Constantine (the son of Constantius) emerged from the ensuing power struggles as sole emperor of a reunified Rome in 324. He moved the Roman capital to the Greek city of Byzantium, which he renamed Constantinople.”(History.com 2). This quote perfectly describes what bad things the tetrarchy eventually led to. The empire was back to having people fight for sole power like what happened in ancient times with Rome and other empires that also eventually fell. Constantine was not a good leader because upset a lot of people that shouldn’t have been upset. He moved the Roman capital to the city of Rome which was very historical, to a Greek city which he named after himself. Constantine was looking to be remembered as a leader who could take control and create a new capital for his empire, but he was just hurting the already weakened empire. The fall of Rome was not because of the tetrarchy; instead it was the leaders who had control over the tetrarchy who made many large mistakes, like Constantine.

Religious mistakes from poor leaders also had a lot to do with the fall of Rome. Faith, zeal, curiosity, and the more earthly passions of malice and ambition kindled the flame of theological discord; the church, and even the state, were distracted by religious factions, whose conflicts were sometimes bloody, and always implacable; the attention of the emperors was diverted from camps to synods; the Roman world was oppressed by a new species of tyranny; and the persecuted sects became the secret enemies of their country,” (Gibbon). As Constantine decided to make Christianity the official religion of the Roman Empire, the people began to outrage. Christianity, not long before this time, was considered illegal to the empire. Christian people were even persecuted for being Christian because they were stubborn and didn’t follow the laws that were set for religions throughout the empire.  It made no sense for a religion, years before that frowned upon, to be the officially religion of the empire no matter what any emperor said. Religion was definitely one of the larger areas of complaints which eventually lead to the fall of an admirable empire.

Lastly, the Roman Empire fell because Barbarians were taking over the land without any control. “Cold, poverty, and a life of danger and fatigue, fortify the strength and courage of Barbarians. In every age they have oppressed the polite and peaceful nations of China, India, and Persia, who neglected, and still neglect, to counterbalance these natural powers by the resources of military art,” (Gibbon). Barbarians are uncivilized people sometimes called savages. They are strong fighters, but they don’t know how to have that mental sense of fighting. They are just strictly physical. The barbarian people wanted war with the Romans, and invading their land was the best that they could do against the large empire at the time. As the Romans were trying to build up their weakening empire again, the Barbarians came and invaded their land which led to many battles and fights. The Roman people, in the end, couldn't defend themselves or their empire, which is the last reason why the Roman Empire fell.

Bad emperors who make many mistakes in the reign can lead to the fall of any empire. Constantine was an overall average emperor, but he made a lot of little mistakes which led to big impacts on the Roman Empire, like the change of the capital and religion. Selfish emperors only weaken and empire; and in this case, a selfish emperor destroyed an empire. In conclusion, the Roman Empire did fall because of the mistakes of the Roman people and leaders at the time, religious problems, and finally being attacked by the Barbarians. The Roman Empire was not able to evolve itself this time, it had fallen and was not ever going to be the strong empire that it once was.

Works Cited:
Ancient Rome, (2011). In Decline and Disintegration. Retrieved Apr. 12, 2011, from

Gibbon, E. (n.d.). Medieval Sourcebook: Gibbon: The Fall of the Roman Empire .FORDHAM.EDU. Retrieved April 12, 2011, from http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/source/gibbon-fall.html
               

4 comments:

  1. 1. yes
    2. You have a good thesis, but it isn't all grammaticality correct.
    3. yes
    4. yes
    5. Good conclusion but here is a few grammatical mistakes and there is a little bit of repetition
    6. good emphasis
    7. good
    8. make sure there are no contractions
    9. good
    10. good information
    11. good

    Overall, your essay was good. You clearly show your opinion and have some great supporting evidence. Make sure you go back and fix the grammar mistakes like commas or the way things are worded. Also, do not use contractions. Good work!

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  2. Peer Review
    1. Yes
    2. Your thesis statement is pretty long and it's kind of wordy.
    3. In in-text citations, put the date after the author's name in the parentheses. Good bibliography.
    4. Yes
    5. Good conclusion, summed up the main points of your essay.
    6. Your strongest analysis is in the last body paragraph, great job.
    7. There are no personal pronouns.
    8. It is very coherent, but check your contractions.
    9. Very specific information, you avoided generalizations.
    10. All the information is related to the fall of Rome and you stay on topic throughout.
    11. This essay was good because you make a good argument with specific information to back it up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Reviewers: Please be sure to give specific details. Cite the essay itself in your critique.

    ReplyDelete
  4. "The Roman Empire dealing with a lot of ups and downs during its long era of power was able to make it around a bad time and make something good out of it; but the Roman Empire did eventually fall apart completely so the empire was completely over and left in ruins because of bad emperors, religious problems, and because of the barbarians that took over the empire."

    This is a bit unwieldy as a thesis statement. First: refrain from using informal language such as "ups and downs"; second: break this down into two parts and connect them via a semi-colon -- the second part should clearly state your argument.

    ReplyDelete